Sunday, August 20, 2006

A Grammar Lesson from LKDSB Retiree Crazy Mary

"Y'all" is singular. "All y'all" is plural. "All y'all's" is plural possessive.... and that's one to grow on fool's.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Erieau Summer Blockbusters!



Hello Celluloid Heroes,

What if you were like me and couldn't afford a subscription to "People" magazine and couldn't stand the smell and the screaming kiddies @ the "Cinema 6" in Chatham? How could you get your taste of celebrity then, huh? Well it's easy in Erieau, yo. Two of the prime cinematic stars of summer were spotted in the Village just this weekend.

Now I didn't actually see Ricky Bobby in his WonderBread Jumpsuit and Monte Carlo, but I do know that someone got their Talledega Nights workin' on Rich's steps....word is the car BUMPER didn't fair too well either. Who else could that be but Ricky?

On Friday night, I was getting my buzz on @ the "Joint Whos Name We Dare Not Speak" when I swear I saw Capt. Jack Sparrow and posse enter the Sandbar. Avast ye Mateys, a pirate finally visiting Kent County's answer to Davey Jone's Locker. Capt Jack was rocking a head-kerchief, a torn white shirt with blood on the sleeve, ripped shorts and a braided beard. I wanted to get the 411 from him...was he here to get some Erieau booty? Was he looking for someone to walk his plank? Was that a spare wooden leg he was sportin' or was he just happy to see me?
I didn't get the chance to talk to him. He was chatting up Crazy Mary when I approached and she asked him if pirates really only got blown offshore....so I split. Aargh, if you talked to the pirate in the Sandbar on Friday, comment in and give us the buzz Matey! Be in Erieau next week for chance sightings of Superman and the mean boss from "The Devil Wears Prada". Later Buckaneers!

Monday, August 07, 2006

Get Outta the Kitchen.....


Hello Civil Weekenders!

Those of you lucky enough to have had a 3 day hiatus from whatever Gulag you're slaving at need to remember not everyone was as fortunate this holiday weekend. You know it was a scorcher yesterday and today just sipping some Lucky lagers and dipping in the Erie, so imagine how intense it was for the brothers and sisters frying up the smelt and pickeral cheeks at our local hostelries.

Check it! Here's one kitchen kitty that could no longer stand the heat and got the hell out of the kitchen..... which reminds me, full moon's on Wednesday y'all!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Rondeau Bay's a Cruel Mistress


Listen Up ye Ol' Seadogs,
Here's the 411. Timothy's BabyMomma (check the "comments", Fools) was absolutely right. I did take a hiatus from the Village, The Blog, The Legg's Clan, The Library, The Fishing Tugs, The East-side Hatfield/McCoy's, The Sandbar, The Joint Who's Name we Dare not Speak, The Salmon Derby, The Cadillac, Jackie's basement, The Bayview Bliss Cabin Fish Hut and all of my usual haunts. In a Hollaback to the Griswald's and their Holiday Road, KLC had a vacation, y'all! Instead of strapping Grandma to the roof and heading to Wally-World, I crammed Patches into the back of my Pinto and headed for the Summer Place on the outskirts of beautiful Downtown Rondeau Park. Shout out to the Landlords for letting me bring my goat. Potato and the Blissies won't even let you have service animals in their Cabanas. I like a "learning vacation" y'all, so I thought, why not see what life is like on the other side of that bay.

I must say visiting Rondeau is like visiting one of those quaint little European countries like Albania or Latvia. By that I mean everyone wears crocs and Lederhosen and they just seem to be like 5 years behind us trendy Erieauians. Check this: The Summer Place has only just now completed their very own Salt Water Pool on the edges of the Bay. Don't Rondeaunians know that briny redundancy is ever so 2004? The Rondeau Saltwater Pool is sooo new that the "Fun Rondeaunians" haven't yet violated it with a midnite dip!
Also, Rondeau is just now getting a Boozecan! I stumbled in on Saturday nite and it's kind of an amalgam of both Erieau Hotspots...meaning it's not liscensed and Murray is the houseband. It was totally Deja Vu all over again.
Finally we've all seen the van with the "Erieau" vanity plates cruising the village for the last decade at least. Some dude in a big white Shrewser-Cruiser actually has "Rondeau" vanity plates. Rondeauniains just keep following our lead y'all. BTW...did you ever wonder why no one rocks "C-Kent" or "Tilbury" or "Bothwell" vanity plates?

Anyway, the Rondeaunians were very friendly and Patches and I were just getting to know the local language and customs when our little vacay was surrepticiously cut short! The normally unassuming Rondeaunians turned into the nautical equivalent of Football Hooligans on Wednesday when the EYC sunk the RYC at the yearly regatta. When they found out that Patches and I were from "the village", they upturned, then torched my Pinto and threw Patches and I in the Bay. We had to swim through those weeds for our lives. The shot above shows Patches and I rolling up on the beach outside of the BBC..... and those dudes in lebanon thought they were having issues in foreign lands...oyVey!
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